Rock bottom

And in that moment she knew if no one would hold her she would drown in her sorrow.She had reach at the bottom of rock bottom.



She/her part 1

red-hair-1I was walking down the steps contemplating if I should wait for my next class, I turned my head slightly  and across me there she was. A smile on her face, she changed her hair nahh straightened it and dyed it red, just the front part, she looked gorgeous. I didn’t want to stare for long, damn I almost missed a step. I wanted to say hi, in fact am always the first to say hi just to be in control because with her I stagger for words and loose my train of thoughts. I didn’t say hi in fact I hastened my pace just to reach the exist door first. I didn’t look back, I wanted to know if she had seen me but still didn’t look back. I wonder if am in her thoughts, as she is in mine. I guess am left with that.



arm-1Awhile back i was displeased with a close friend and i chose silence as retaliation. Silence is a big part of me, so they didn’t notice my anger. However tragic knocked me back to my senses, a stranger that i like to think i came to know was laid six feet under. Death cleared my vision. I wronged you. It has been a while now as i try each day to make amends but you fear the unknown. Yet again, two souls have been taken from the face of this earth before my eyes. I can’t claim to have really known them well. What am trying to say is that baby don’t hold on to what is toxic. I know different Sh*t weigh us down differently, i ain’t in your shoe, i don’t know how low you have gone. Am reaching out, my arms stretched out, you can hold on whenever. Death has yet again reminded me how it is close to life. I am writing because am breathing now. I don’t know about the next minutes of life just that am in love with you and it will remain so-eternity. Let go, try looking up,am here, hold on to me please.


Too much for a single soul

I was looking for some sort of high, that’s when i saw and fell for you, it wasn’t your fault.You introduced me to your sexualized world, your body being that of a god, all who gazed upon you bowed down to your will and command.  Baby you had me, body and soul. When you gave me that lap dance, when i left in my mind i was contented with a story of who we could be. To be honest i hoped you would hit me up and show me some love but a couple of days past, still nothing from you. So i dropped by, you had a busted lip, a scar on your lower eye that no make up could hide. You claimed it was nothing that ‘he’ was looking out for you. That day i stuck around because i respect your hustle nonetheless i wanted to be by your side. Guess it worked, you seen me come through. You took me to your place it wasn’t as i had expected.



Old music records of the likes of Frank Sinatra, Miles Davis, Nat King Cole, Nina Simone and Tony Bennett stuck on your wall with a  Lucero LC100 Classical Guitar beside them. In my mind i was like “Girl you playing me, this can’t be your place”.

We got comfortable so you played me your all. It was an old soul,everything you sung i could tell you had gone through. That very moment i despised myself for wanting all of you to myself. I became conscious of the fact that you were too much for a single soul.


Yet again misunderstood, this time am taking all the bullets. Its not fair, they did not warn me.



i wasn’t ready for war just walked in a battle filed with no rifle and knowledge of what am fighting for. So forgive me for any defeat, forgive me for thinking its not fair, forgive me if i mourn, forgive me for not being ready to hurt.